(663) Couch to 5k

Today, my husband and I are starting this program. It seems manageable. It is 3x a week for 9 weeks. Here's the link to the program and here's the link to the Android app. Hopefully I can stick with this... I need to do something since I don't go to zumba anymore. It seems like it'll be good because you don't start off running the whole time and that's one of the parts that I struggle with. I get discouraged when I can't run that far and then I just give up.

Has anyone done this program before? Did it work for you? Any tips?

(661) Stupid noises

I know I'm in the minority here... that seems to be the case regarding military spouse life. Whatever. Our post just started (or made louder) the noises it plays. It goes off around 7am and 10pm and it's so annoying. I'm not one for tradition and all that. I just think it's annoying. My life is inconvenienced enough by the army that adding another thing like this make me want to leave. I wasn't the only one complaining and a response on the housing page was to move off post... honestly not really a viable option for us... seeing as how we are most likely PCSing in a few months. More and more I wish we hadn't decided for Mike to reenlist.

(660) The most awkward exam ever

In order to PCS, I have to get medically screened to make sure there is nothing wrong with me that they can't handle at the new duty station. Part of that requires my last yearly girly exam. Well I thought I had one done last year but turns out it didn't count (it was because of irregular periods, so they didn't do a full exam I guess). So I had to get it done today. I HATE these exams. No matter how hard they try, the whole experience is so freakin awkward. The doctor was really helpful though.  She put me on prenatal vitamins because I'm trying to get pregnant. She asked if I wanted a prescription and I said yes, that way I didn't have to pay for them lol.

That's another thing done. Still have to wait about 10 days to get the lab results back and then I can make the appointment with EFMP person. We're still waiting to hear back from whoever regarding his clearance and we can't get orders til he gets that and we pretty much can't do much else until we get orders.... hurry up and wait...

(658) Fuck you army and stupid tropical storm

I am not cut out to be an army wife. I can't do this. Not again... I'm so frustrated with the damn army. As soon as he is done with his contract, we are done. I can't take the anxiety. I never expected them to pull this kind of crap. He's only been home 7 months and now they are planning to go to NYC for who knows how long. He's been at work all day (since 7) and things keep changing and it's driving me crazy. They haven't done a damn thing to keep any spouses informed and it's pissing me off. I'm feeling so physical sick from all the anxiety and when I'm anxious I can't eat because my stomach hurts like hell. Oh and saying "at least he's not XXXXXX" doesn't fickin help me at all. He was JUST there. For a year. I wasn't anticipating him going on a mission for at least a year. I expected training exercises and crap like that, but not this. I was not prepared for something like this even happening. I just want my husband home for at least a year like I was told. I'm not ready in anyway to be separated from him for any length of time. Shit, even when he has CQ, I can't sleep at night. I can deal with that, but I can't deal with him going into an unknown situation. Not yet. I'm not ready to let him go. Once it hits a year since it's been home, then I can expect him to leave at any point... but not before that. Being an army wife is not good when you have anxiety problems and eating problems.

I think tomorrow will be better, even if he has to go because at least I'll have work and wont be sitting around all day. Doesn't help that he took the car this morning so I haven't been able to go anywhere and I don't have enough energy to walk the 3 miles to his work and get it.

(657) More PCS progress

Last Thursday we had the levy briefing. It was basically a person going through a folder of papers with us (mostly him). There's only a couple things we can do before we get orders and that wont happen until he gets his clearance and probably something else, but I'm not sure. I have to get my EFMP screening to make sure I don't have any issues that would prevent me from going (which I don't think that I do...). I thought that I had a Pap done last year because I saw my gyn, but I called and turns out it was for something else (nothing serious), so I had to schedule an appointment... fun... NOT. I can't schedule the screening process until this is done.

The only other thing I can do right now is get no fee passport, which basically allows me to live there. Well, I don't think that they actually give it to you until you have orders, but I can get it started so they can process it. I'm still waiting to get my regular passport and birth certificate back in the mail before I can go do that.

I'm not sure what I need to do with my cats....

Oh and we found out that we will be there for 36 months. I think it will be interesting to be in another country. I've only ever been to Canada and I don't really count that. I'm trying to not get too excited because it could all fall through (it could do that up until he signs in to his new unit).

On an unrelated note, Michael and I celebrated our 2nd anniversary last Tuesday. It was nice to be able to spend it together, instead of many miles apart...

(656) Italy

A couple weeks ago, my hubby got a slot for Italy. As of now, we are going to PCSing there next year. I'm soooo excited, but not too excited, because of course that could change. I've never been to another country (besides Canada, which doesn't really count when you're from NY). There are so many things we're going to have to do but can't start until we get his orders.

Last week he told me to get my passport so I did. I got the pictures done at Walmart and looking back, I realize I could've just done them myself instead of paying the $8 for them to take a digital picture and print it on photo paper. Lesson learned I guess. Then I went to the post office to drop off the application and their debit/credit card machines were down, so I had to drive to the bank and get out $140 and then wait in line again. I also hate the fact that they need my original birth certificate, so now I'm without one. Hopefully I don't need it for any other paper work any time soon.

I have also been learning Italian using Rosetta Stone. I've been using the skillport classes to take it. I might take a class through the local community college as well.

(655) Pissed off

I am so sick of the army messing with my life. After a year of deployment, I just want it to stop. Last week, I had planned to visit my family 4 hours away because my sister and nephew were moving out of state. Thursday (the day before we were supposed to leave), he gets a text message from his boss saying  he has CQ (24hr duty) on Saturday. I got so pissed off. My husband is home, he's supposed to be able to do things with me instead of the army taking more of his time. He was able to trade his CQ for another person's who had it on Tuesday. We even paid this person $50 to trade since Mike's CQ was scheduled for the weekend.

Then today he sends me a  text message at work saying that he has it tomorrow. WTF. I hate things brought on me at the last minute. I'm sick of his unit's incompetence when it comes to simple things.

I can't take this anymore. I was not made to be in this life. I'm just not happy here. Ever since I moved here, I feel like I've lost myself. I don't know who I am anymore. Every day seems like the last and I'm getting frustrated.